"Their Way"

THEIR WAY (Sung to Frank Sinatra's "My Way," of course.)  

I came, brought all my books, lived in the dorm, followed directions. 

I worked, I studied hard, met lots of folk who had connections. 

I crammed, they gave me grades, though may I say, not in a fair way. 

But more, much more than this, I did it their way.  

I memorized all sorts of things, although I know I'll never use them. 

The courses that I took were all required; I didn't choose them. 

I learned that to survive it's best to act the doctrinaire way. 

And so I buckled down, and did it their way.

  
But there were times, I wondered why I had to walk when I could fly. 

I had my doubts, but after all, I clipped my wings, I learned to crawl, 

I learned to bend, and in the end, I did it their way.  

And so, my fine young friend, now that I am a full professor, 

Where once I was oppressed, I've now become the cruel oppressor. 

Like me, you'll learn to cope, you'll learn to climb life's golden stairway. 

Like me, you'll see the light, you'll do it their way.  

For what can I say, what can I do? Open your book, read chapter two. 

And if to you, it seems routine, don't speak to me, go see the dean. 

As long as they give me my pay, I'll do it . . . their way!  

(Words by Bob Blue, sung by Michael Cooney on Prairie Home Companion, April 18, 1987. Transcribed from broadcast by Tom Welbers.)